I thought this was a really valuable reflection on how we can become more conscious, shaking loose from our stuck places through intention from the Mindfulness Institute.
New Year's Resolutions: Reflections On Stuckness And Becoming Unstuck
As
we anticipate the unfolding of another year, we face wonderful moment to moment
opportunities to consciously direct both the development of our brains
(neuroplasticity), and who we will become (epigenetics). As the beginning of a
new year, January is a popular time for reassessing one’s life – a practice
often accompanied by a set of new year’s resolutions formed to address areas of
unhappiness. The majority of people soon abandon their intentions; failing to
consistently follow through on their resolutions, they lapse into
discouragement, self judgement and demoralization, giving up on themselves and
their goals.
In order to successfully change any aspect of our lives, it is crucial to be consciously aware of:
In order to successfully change any aspect of our lives, it is crucial to be consciously aware of:
1.
What we want to change.
2. Why we want to change it.
3. How we are going to accomplish this.
2. Why we want to change it.
3. How we are going to accomplish this.
Only with this awareness can we form a clear intention about how we choose to address the situation, and act firmly and decisively in a manner consistent with this intention. Two of the biggest challenges people face in accomplishing their new year’s resolutions are not knowing how to persevere to achieve the change they desire, and not recognizing the areas of stuckness that cause them difficulty in the first place. In my experience the process of transformation begins with reflection – reflection on one’s life with a focus not on the external world, but on taking a very close inventory of one’s internal world as follows:
- One’s patterns of thoughts, emotions and actions
- One’s attitudes towards self, others and life
- One’s interpersonal interactions and reactions
Without introspection it can be difficult to identify these patterns. Without meditation it can be difficult to realize that they are often just habits we default to automatically; ingrained tendencies that constrict our sense of self and limit our freedom without us even realizing it.
Close scrutiny and contemplation of our internal and external patterns while letting go of attachment to them can help us to become aware of areas of stuckness within ourselves. Consider which of the areas listed above you might have degrees of stuckness in. As you go through the above inventory you might choose to itemize each area of stuckness, as well as:
- Where or when the stuckness originated
- How it has helped and/or hindered you
- Why you have chosen (consciously or unconsciously) to continue this pattern
- Whether you choose to take the steps to become unstuck from this pattern at this time
Once your inventory has been compiled, the process of transformation has begun! This process works with awareness in the present moment as well as with life affirming attitudes, and is no different from any other mindfulness work. For ease of application, it can be conceptualized in 5 easy steps:
1. Identify the area of stuckness along with its when’s, where’s and why’s.
2. Set a clear intention of how you would like things to be different. Consider all the alternative possibilities of thinking, perceiving, reacting or interacting. Internally rehearse these and envision their outcomes.
3. Notice how your stuckness may neglect or ignore any of the mindful attitudes – non-judgement, patience, acceptance, letting go, beginner’s mind, kindness, generosity and compassion. Experiment with applying these attitudes to the area of stuckness.
4. Practice noticing when your thoughts, feelings or behaviours are no longer aligned with your intention. This is rather like noticing when the focus of awareness is no longer on the breath in the breath-awareness exercise.
5. Reconnect with your intention and realign your thoughts, feelings and actions with this intention.
Just as with any other mindfulness exercise we set our intention, we practice noticing when we have lost our alignment (focus) with our intention, and when we discover that our thoughts, emotions or behaviour have wandered, we gently but firmly re-align them with our initial intention. This decreases the conflict between conscious intention and unconscious habitual patterns, freeing us from the limitations those patterns carry and allowing us to take a more active role in consciously creating our life. This also helps establish consistency between intention and action, and leads us to peace. And through this process, applied moment by moment to our observations of ourselves and our interactions with the external world, life itself becomes a meditation practice, with each moment full of creative possibilities. May 2012 be transformational for you!
Catherine
L. Phillips, MD, CM FRCP(C)
