Emotional Intelligence & Anger

The post below is from George Anderson, coach and "Anger Management Expert" and creator of the Anger Management Forum.

The topic of Emotional intelligence (EI) is a crucial one in our personal and professional lives. In the workplace, most of us have experienced the impacts of others emotions and their expression at some point in time. As George discusses in this article, the world of work can be a frustrating place these days. With so much economic uncertainty, downsizing and increased workloads for those "lucky" enough to continue to be employed, the workplace leaves us all with many emotions to manage.

Emotional Intelligence: An Antidote to Anger

1. Learn and practice optimism for success: see the doughnut, not the hole

To do more than survive – to thrive in a world of accelerating change and uncertainty – we need to respond well to adversity. Optimism is a skill just like listening which can be learned and perfected over time.

2. Positive self-talk: talk yourself out of defeat and anger.

The way we talk to ourselves can and does affect our sense of well-being and our ability to motivate ourselves in the face of challenge. By being optimistic and learning to replace negative self-talk with positive self-talk, this will help to bring about a proactive and creative climate at work and help participants to be proactive and take control of themselves.

3. The art of letting go: you’ll never be a butterfly if you can’t stop being a caterpillar.

It is important to learn to tackle the essence of coping effectively with change and letting go of old ways of thinking and doing. Challenging existing concepts enables the participants to understand their own resistance to change.

4. Managing unhealthy anger: you can’t always get what you want

Many people have difficulty managing anger - both their own and other people. Frustrations built up in the fast-changing workplace, where roles are not always well defined and job security no longer exists.

Anger usually results from frustration. Frustration results from feeling unable to control and/or improve their situation. A sense of control is a basic human need. Frustration behaves like an emotional virus, infecting everyone.

5. Increasing sensitivity: take a look at the emotional landscape

In a stressful work environment, it is easy to ignore the mood and morale of our co-workers. People rarely communicate how they feel. However, being insensitive to the needs and feeling of others makes it hard to gain their support and enthusiasm. The ability to recognize our own feelings and the emotions of those around us is a key step in developing emotional literacy.

Emotions bring people together. Our emotions are perhaps the greatest potential source of uniting all members of the human race. Empathy, Compassion, Cooperation and Forgiveness together have the potential to unite us as people. Our thoughts may tend to divide us, whereas our emotions, if give the chance, will unite us.

Emotional Intelligence is one of the most promising interventions available for anger management.